As the candle lighting proceeds around the circle of participants, each person shares a dedication and memory of abuse that had affected their family.
Vigil a reminder of the dangers of domestic violence
By Charles Clark
Choctaw Nation
Tvshka Homma, Okla. - Emotions ran high at the second Remember My Name Memorial/Vigil. Beginning just before dusk Oct. 2 at the Choctaw Nation Capitol grounds at Tvshka Homma, more than 35 women, men, and youth gathered in the cafeteria. October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month. At last year’s inaugural event Chief Gary Batton was the first chief in Choctaw history to sign a proclamation recognizing the focus of the month and the seriousness of physical violence within families.
The Choctaw Nation Children & Family Services’ Family Violence Prevention Program sponsored the event. Representatives from several of the Nation’s programs that touch on domestic violence came together to share information. Help is available for members of the Choctaw Nation and some offices offer help to anyone in need. Jennifer Woods, Community Based Social Work director in Hugo, gave an opening prayer. District 10’s Little Miss Kylee Hampton and Junior Miss Maci Wagoner gave The Lord’s Prayer in sign language. Cherity Wallace, of Children & Family Services in Durant, gave a reading of the proclamation previously signed by Chief Batton.
Sabrina Ralls, of Children & Family Services in Poteau, gave a reading of the poem “Remember My Name.”
“My daughter Ashleigh was 20 years old and four months pregnant with my first grandchild when she was killed,” said Tara Woodlee.
Woodlee was the keynote speaker of the evening. The Texas resident is the founder of Ashleigh’s Patience Project. Woodlee spoke about her own experience of being abused by a previous husband, and then detailed her daughter Ashleigh Marie Lindsey’s life, and eventual death, at the hands of an abuser.
“I could not find a place to kiss my daughter’s face that was not covered in blood,” she spoke of her daughter’s final moments. “Then, I watched my grandchild die on a sonogram.”
Woodlee and the other speakers stressed the importance of seeking professional help if involved in abusive situations and not waiting until it is too late.
Woodlee’s presentation concluded as the sun was setting. At that time Marcia Hampton, Choctaw Nation Domestic Violence/Sexual Assault Advocate based in Atoka, and primary organizer of the evening, guided everyone outdoors for the candle lighting ceremony.
As each candle in the circle was lit, people offered dedications in memory of someone lost to domestic violence. In some cases, the dedication was for a person currently in a dangerous and painful situation.
The thread of the event was to let people know that the Choctaw Nation stands firmly against domestic violence and that help is being provided.
Another public event scheduled this month is the Glow Run, set for 6 p.m. Oct. 23 starting at the Choctaw Nation Community Center in Atoka. The evening 5K run will have tee-shirts for participants. In addition to the fun, the activity has the added purpose of spreading the word that “Domestic violence is not our tradition.” For information or to register, call marcia hampton at 580-889-1955 or Cherity Wallace, 580-924-8280 Ext. 2663.
For more information
Choctaw Nation Children and Family Services
1-800-522-6170, Ext. 2482, 2402, 2497 or 2635.
Choctaw Nation Project SAFE
Durant, 580-924-8280
Broken Bow, 580-584-3150
Talihina, 918-567-4265
Ashleigh’s Patience Project
903-449-2335 or Ashleighspatienceprojec@gmail.com